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This World Yoga Day Weekend, Remember to Stretch Your Body, Not Your Jokes

By Jaanvi Advani 21 June 2019

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Yoga is all kinds of liberating until you stretch more than your bod can handle and end up pulling a muscle you didn’t know you had. Jokes too are all fun and games until you stretch them more than you should and end up hurting everyone involved—by which we mean yourself, and all of social media. This yoga day, take a deep breath and (maybe) let. it. go.

1. Sahil Shah’s ‘Vatana’

Vatana means “peas” in Marathi. Initially just used as a pointless funny-sounding (everything sounds funnier when Shah says [yells!] it) reply to trolls, Vatana became his “only Infinity Stone you need to snap Trolls away”. Now his army of followers respond to anything and everything Shah says with “Aaaaye, vatana”. We’ve personally heard fans yell VATANAAA at live shows and have no clue how much longer this Childish Behaviour will continue. Vatanearth are you thinking, Sahil? Vatana merch? Vatacrazyboy hahaha. Ok, stop.

2. Kanan Gill’s ‘Rgds’

Who knew the most eye-rolled closing salutation—Regards (or Rgds, as we Indians love writing)—could be hilarious out of context and overused… everyday… repeatedly? Well, Kanan knew. His captions, comments on his own post, comments on other people’s posts, Instastory remarks… everything is just lined with ‘Rgds’. Of course his entire fanbase also picked up on it, and now that’s the only communication they need. Gill’s intense commitment to the joke, peeking through his new handlebar moustache, is commendable, but is it time for both to go? Please let us know at your earliest convenience. Rgds.

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Go study Rgds

A post shared by Kanan Gill (@kanangill) on

3. Kunal Kamra’s ‘Don’t Vote for Modi’ Photoshop Series

We’re not saying that “Don’t vote for Modi” tattoo Kamra got on his arm is fake, and that he didn’t actually go to the moon and dig the same campaign poster deep into its craters. We laughed hysterically when we saw him hanging with the Night King; likewise when we saw Modi peeping creepily from unexpected corners. But somewhere between Kamra showing up in the Ambani wedding photos and the Modi administration recharging its batteries for another five years, we saw a glimpse of our future: one long, tiring joke. And only one is still funny.

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*Bedroom main bhi aayenge toh modi hi* With @umar_khalid87

A post shared by Kamra (@kuna_kamra) on

4. Biswa Kalyan Rath’s ‘Ja-Pun’ game

Biswa was recently in Japan for some “work”. Japan has a mad vibe, and no one can fault you for letting it mess with your head, especially when you’re travelling alone. But when Biswa is left unsupervised, Biswa goes bananas. The result? A series of (terrible) puns, insisting that the names of all of Japan’s shops, streets, and restaurants are derived from Hindi. ‘Biswest Aadmi’ just wouldn’t stop. We can’t even say for sure that we wanted him to.

Here’s a quick sampling, though there’s a whole pile of them sitting in his Instagram highlights, awaiting your attention.

5. Surbhi Bagga’s #StayHydrated

Why do brand endorsements and advertisements, when you can photobomb wedding pictures by posing with a bottle? This stretched joke isn’t stretched enough if you don’t remember Surbhi’s message that comes with it—stay healthy, stay hydrated. Listen to her, or she is going to magically show up in all your wedding pictures with a Bisleri bottle in her hand.

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Bisleri Water Girl #stayhydratedkids 💧

A post shared by Surbhi Bagga (@surbhi.bagga) on

6. Nishant Suri’s ‘Cupcakes’

Ok this is going to sound like code for something dirty, but Nishant Suri has an unhealthy obsession with Prashasti Singh’s cupcakes. As in, she got him the cupcakes, and he ate them. Forever. And ever. And ever. A stretched joke that could end with an inability to stretch his body. But Suri DGAF. He’s been eating cupcakes on his Instastories, grooving to different songs. When he realised none of us could stop watching, he started collaborating with other comics… more people eating cupcakes… more people grooving to random songs. And now, if his Instastory is to be believed, he’s getting “fan requests” to make more of these videos. MOAR CUPCAKES?! Bon(bon) appetit!

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